please :'(

hey this is my first post. my main reason to blog is to let out my thoughts but i don't feel comfortable when some friends read them. that is why i dont really mind about the grammar or spelling or anything that they say important.
i am a little sad now. since my crush seems like he is going out of the country. i even haven't talk to him :'( ah, what i am trying to be. i'm not strong. i am NOT a little sad. i feel brokenhearted. i've known him since we was on 3rd grade. he was my church buddy. but we never hang with the same circle which make me never talk to him. maybe once or twice if the situation support. i was OK with that but that was before i like him this much. we were separated for like 3 or 4 yrs. i met him again about 1year ago in a youth church (forgive me God for i have sinned). he has changed so much. a skinny quiet boy turns out to be a boy of my dream. he was tall, white, always smiling. he also plays guitar and basketball.
i am such a coward. i have been gaining my guts to talk to him since the first day i met him again but he was always surrounded by his friends. there is no way i'm going to talk to him and act stupidly (i know i will when i'm nervous) in front of a bunch of boys. i have no topic, anyway. i never thought he'll leave because i see no reason for him to do so. one of my close friend was a close friend of him (try to read it slowly if you don't understand) but she never help me to get closer to him though she knew i have this major crush for him. no personal reason, she just dont realized i desperately need her help :(
i know that he'll be leaving out of the country from his facebook account. i haven't know it for sure but this is my first hunch. i didn't see any other meanings beside it anyway. i surely hope my hunch was wrong.
lately, beside gaining my guts to talk to him, i also found his twitter and tweet him with enermous hope that he will tweet me back. i might turns out to be a lunatic thinking of him. please stay boy. please dont leave. not this soon. i need you to know that i'm not only an ordinary girl which is a friend of your friend's friend. i need you to know my feelings. i need you to know that you're my shooting star among the ordinary star. i need you to know that i want to know you more. please? :'(

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